Summer Time Bowls (Part 3)

So its time for another game of bowls... this time we swap the great lawn in my parents house for the crappy soil pit which is our back garden... and well I should have a bit of an advantage here as well because I've had a bit of practice... but my challenger may have an advantage herself due to the fact that the soil pit is a lot smaller than the lawn at my parents... and by the way my challenger who is looking some revenge as well is my daughter Bethany "The Bulk" Aspin!!! Once again I gave Beth a ten shot lead and she wins the toss of the coin and we get this game under way!!!

In the first end Beth seems to have no rhythm... but I seem unstoppable and take the first end by four shots... but Beth continues with her poor form in the second end and I was three shots up and with her last shot she is able to get the closest shot with one hell of a bowl... I'm shocked... and kind of worried... but I slog on anyway and win the next three ends... with the scores sitting at 8-11 I think back to our last match when at this stage we were all level and I think to myself I need to start bringing it!!! And when I think I'm going to win another end Beth smashes her way through with her last bowling pushing it back to her other bowl to take two shots and a 5 shot lead!!! In the seventh end there was a bowling master class... But it was Beth who took all the advantages... and it looked like she had it in the bag but on my last bowl I roll down my ball and get a toucher... but my luck was out because I managed to move the Jack far enough so one of Beth's bowls was touching as well... therefore its a tie end!!! And it got worse for me when Beth won the eighth end by one shot!!! So I'm currently six shots down with two ends to go... and its not looking too good... but I battle on regardless... and I'm effect pulls off when I get a shot in the ninth... but it still leaves me needing five shots in the last end to draw!!! Anyway I go for it... and my first three shorts go well while Beth starts swinging madly and all her shots go into the ditch... I follow her up with my forth while she rolls hers up close to my third shot!!! I  roll my fifth shot down and I'm sitting with four shots... but Beth rolls one in... I need to take this one out but i feck up and leave myself with four shots just... but to rub some salt in the wound Beth rolls one in right beside my second best shot!!! So in the tenth end I walk away with two shots... there for its a 11-14 victory to Beth!!!  Well done Beth... that was a real competitive match... and I think next time we will play we will be taking one of your shot advantages of you!!! Anyway we are away here... our Dominos has arrived... ARE YOU JEALOUS???

Artemis Beartrappe - 27
Rest of the World - 8

Summer Time Bowls (Part 2)

After seeing his granddaughter get defeated... Beth's Pappy... aka my Dad took up the challenge in Bowls... we have had many a match at bowls throughout the years in this very back garden... so this should be a great contest!!! And that's exactly what it was!!! Joe came out of the blocks strong winning the first end in convincing style... three shots not good for me... and this patterned continued until the fifth end... by that stage it was 9-0 to Joe... getting destroyed here big time... but once again I started to hear "Eye of the Tiger" and the comeback was on... in the sixth and seventh I picked up a shot in each and in the seventh I got a whopping four... still trailing by three I pushed on... in the eighth I miss played my shot and gave Joe two shots... 11-6 but its not over till the fat lady sings... and I came out swinging in the ninth and got two important shots but still trailed by three on 11-8!!! It was all down to the final end... and before i had even bowled my last shot I was sitting three up... and as I bowled my last and scuffed it off my foot sending it into the ditch!!! Pure agony... but I released that I am currently drawing level... but that was only monumentality because Joe bowled his last shot down and landed closer to the Jack than my third closer!!! With that I win two points but lose the overall match 11-10!!! This match was an instant classic... and rather enjoyable too... I think this could be as big of a feud between me and my dad at bowls as it is with me and Tristan at Connect 4!!! Let this great weather continue... and let the bowls flow!!!


Artemis Beartrappe - 27
Rest of the World - 7

Summer Time Bowls (Part 1)

Finally we have some beautiful weather in Belfast... currently I am  just sitting back chillaxing at the parents house... with the sun beating down and the smell of some freshly cut grass its time to play a game... what game do you ask... bowls!!! Not the type you see old people playing... but its more like the French game whose name escapes me and I'm too lazy to search the internet for!!! Anyway the challenger today is Bethany "The Bulk" Aspin... So to give her an advantage I allow her a ten shot lead... am I being to generous? Well let's find out... but first here's the rules...

• Firstly you need need an even amount of bowls each and a smaller ball called the Jack
• Flip a coin to see who goes first
• The winner of the loss throws the Jack down
• Each player then takes turn throwing one bowl at a time as close to the Jack as possible
• The winner is who ever is closer to the Jack
• The points are worked out by how many bowls are closest to the Jack before an opponnents bowl is next in line
• The game is played over ten ends
• The winner is who ever has the most points
• The winner of the end starts the next end of by throwing the Jack first

So anyway I start off real strong... and by the fifth end I have levelled the game up... and from there I start to bring my A game... and by the eighth end I have a massive eight shot lead! But Beth never gave up once and kept slugging on... In the ninth end I scrapped a point out of the end after Beth with her last shot pushed my bowl up for the shot... And with that victory but we decided to carry on anyway with the last end... Beth being the fighter she is won the last end by two shot... The final score 19 - 12 but I think Beth found her sweet spot at the end... so ill have to watch her on those short ends from now on!!! Anyway don't let the score fool you... this was a real close match and rather fun too... you gotta enjoy this weather when you can and I can say me and Beth certainly did!!!

Artemis Beartrappe - 27
Rest of the World - 6

The Return From Twickenham (Part 4)

STILL ON THIS FREAKING BOAT!!! But at least we are closer to home... and once again the Connect 4 board is out once again!!! Challenger one Jay... And if you remember the last time he played me he defeated me... so I've that in the back of my mind as we start the first game... and when I leave him an opportunity to pick up the victory I thought my losing streak would continue... but he doesn't see it... I am able to block his victory and in turn  get him into a lose lose situation... and moments later victory is mine... in the second and third games they are rather even once again... but I still manage to pick up victories in both!!!

Challenger one dispatched... challenger two is Rory... three easy enough victories followed... and then it was onto my Connect 4 Nemesis... aka Tristan!!! Game one went his way... and thinking to myself would I ever be able to beat him we started the second... and while thinking how I could get a Connect 4 I gift him the victory!!! In my head suddenly I hear music... I builds me with some confidence... and i thought to myself... I can beat him!!! And well the third game I gift him the victory once again... but he doesn't seize his opportunity... I block it and several moves later victory is mine... YES!!! I defeated my Nemesis!!! O and by the way if your wonder the song in my head... it was "Eye of the Tiger" by Survivor... one of the greatest motivational songs ever!!! And from there I went from strength to strength picking up my second victory on the trot again Tristan!!! When the going gets good... the Beartrappe keeps going... but unfortunately in this case we have arrived back in Belfast and are told to head to our car!!! Poor show... I was starting to hit some serious form... we will never know how good I would of got... or whether I would defeat my Nemesis again... but hey maybe some day down the line we will meet and battle once again!!! But this is my signing off after one hell of a trip... and the start of something good!!!

Artemis Beartrappe  - 26

Rest of the World - 6

The Return From Twickenham (Part 3)

Well what a great morning I'm having right now... to start the day off I wake up to this!!!

That's right... I'm still in bloody Liverpool... first the boat engine is screwed... now we have to wait for a new boat to arrive so we can swap ships... and now I miss a days work... therefore a days less pay... and to make it worse I'm still stuck with these bloody kids!!!

But after 19 hours on boats and we are finally on our way... and we manage to find a computer on-board and after a bit of searching I managed to find Chess... may I say now that I really can't stand Macs!!! I don't no what it is about them but they really annoy the shite out of me... give me a Windows computer any day... so anyway me and Jay settle down to a civilised game of chess... and if your not sure of the rules have a we look below!!!

Chess Rules

Anyway I've watched him take on the computer and well he isn't half bad... It must be all the training his dad has been giving him... but this was a great battle... piece by piece was leaving the virtual table... but it started going all my way once a made one of my pawns a queen... four moves later... check mate!!! And with those words said... all I hear once again is... "You Cheated!!!"... Yeah that's right... I hacked into the computer and programmed it so id win... or is it your just shit??? Anyway I ask him if he would like a rematch... and for some reason he declined... LOSER!!!


Artemis Beartrappe  - 18
Rest of the World - 4

The Return From Twickenham (Part 2)

After the long horrible travel up from London we are currently waiting to get on the board... and this is a perfect time to get some gaming in cause God knows how long we will be sitting here for... and after consulting the kids we decide its going to be Connect for... and for you idiot out here this is how you play it...

• Firstly you need to buy the game!!! 
• You then decide who is going to be Red and Yellow or what ever freaking colours they maybe...
• You then take turns place one of the discs in the slots...
• The winner is who ever gets 4 in a row... as in the name...
•  And if you still don't understand... your an idiot!!! So just look at the graphic below!!!

So the first challenger is Roy... In the first game I finish strong after only using 5 counters... the second game is more even but I still manage to get him into a lose lose situation... and then in the final of the three I complete the perfect game... that's right connect four with only four counters. Boo ya!!! My next victim... I mean challenger is Jay... the first game was a real good match... but I end up winning with a double connect four... the next match went more like the way of the matches with Rory and it was over quick... the third match was once again a bit more challenging... but once again I got him in a lose lose situation and victory six is mine!!!

And with the kids dispatched its onto the men... more persificley my cousin Tristan... now with this sport (if you can call it a sport) being tactical he should be a challenge all considering he is one of the best chess players I have ever play. And in our first match you could really feel the tension. The whole family sitting round the table on the boat waiting on our every move. So Im told we took ages for each turn but we were both in the zone. But unforunately two defeats followed for me. Tristan was ruthless and challenged me from start to finish. He outsmarted me into a lose lose situation in the first game and in the second I gifted it too him with a very foolish move. This man has pushed me to the limit!

With the night nearly over one last game of Connect 4 is in order. The challenger Jay... and well it starts off one hell of a battle... blocking each others attempts to win... but after a long and hard slog and with only one choice I could possibly make I gifted Jay his first victory against me and in some way too... he beat me with a connect 5... 5!!! I don't think this game ever expected you to get 5! He was awesome and now I'm kind of glad he has to go to bed or my score lead could of possibly dwindled away if he kept up that form!!! Anyway its been a great weekend of gaming and well its straight to work for me in the morning... lets just hope I have more gaming weekends like this!!!

Artemis Beartrappe  - 17
Rest of the World - 4

The Return From Twickenham (Part 1)

So the long journey has be gone once again... after a very disappointing Cup Final Belfast is our destination!!! And after a call off at a shopping area outside London I bought a few games... first Hello Kitty Top Trumps which may I add is for my daughter Beth and not myself... The next game I got was The Very Hungry Caterpillar Card Game... I don't buy it because it look fun and exciting to tell you the truth... It was more because it cost only 2.99!!! Which I found funny due to the fact that these shops where dearer than the airport... £2.00 for a Red Bull... £1.79 a 500ml bottle of Coke... £2.79 a packet of Haribo... Are they having a laugh??? Being a shop worker myself I was discussed... And well the last game that I bought was a travel Connect 4!!! I have many great memory's of playing this... One of first board games I played with Beth... Playing Natalie in Zante on our Honeymoon while both rather intoxicated... But anyway that the choices for the boat journey home... because its going to be one long journey!!! So will take up the challenge first... and what game will we be playing... keep following to find out!!!

The Journey To Twickenham (Part 3)

Well we are about an hour away from London now and after half an hour of Rory going on and on about playing the dot game I give in... now that sounds bad... its not I was trying to dodge the challenge... it was more I was trying to bloody sleep!!! Anyway Rory said we would set the game up so I let him tear away... and after several minutes he handed me the below...

How the hell are we going to play with that? I suppose its my fault... letting a child do a man's job! Anyway I set the game up and we started to play... not quiet sure he got how the game worked as straight of the he started to give me squares... this could be far too easy! And after getting a small lead Rory started to wise up and get with the game... I worked on one huge chain for a while while god knows what he was doing. Problem was I was concentrating too much on mine and not looking at his... and that endly badly when he got himself nine squares... doh!!! As the same continued I saw an opportunity to win big... and by giving away four squares I left him no choice but to help me collect the remaining squares. In this game sometimes you have too give away squares to win big! So another victory to be in the square game. That's two on the trot. And like the graceful win that his brother Jay is he started to call me a Chester... to cous... don't hate the player... hate the game!

Artemis Beartrappe - 11
Rest of the World - 1

The Journey To Twickenham (Part 2)

Well you join me once again on the road to Twickinem... and currently we have stopped in the middle of no where while my cousin tries to sell a couple of saddles to a master saddler... fun fun fun... and by the way that isn't an inuendo! Between beating the crap out of each other... Jay and Rory decide to challenge me at Noughts and Crosses!!! And in case you have never heard of this game... well shame on you have you been locked up all your life??? But just incase these are the rules...

• First you need a pen and paper
• Next you draw the below out on the sheet of paper

• Each player then chooses whether to be "X's" or "O's"
• Each paper then takes a turn to write down their choice
• The winner is who ever gets three of the choice in a row

Anyway Rory takes me on first... he decides to be X's while I'm O's... and straight of the bat I make a rookie mistake and allow him to get in a no lose situation... shame on me... so first loss in the bag I need to bring my a game... winning the next game... and from that point on that first loss didn't mean squat! Out of the last 8 remaining games I won 5 and drew 2... not to shabby at all! With one challenger dispatched Jay is waiting in the wings to take me on... and within three moves the first game was in the bag... perfect game! Then from there I continued me dominant streak picking up 3 more victory's and the rest draws! So in total 9 victories... 1 lose... and 8 draws... a good showing by myself... and even at that I still get accused of cheating by Jay... how can you cheat at this game? 17 match undefeated streak... so can anyone beat this undertaker like legendary streak?

Artemis Beartrappe - 10

The Rest of the World - 1

The Journey To Twickenham (Part 1)

Well the long journey to Twickenham has begun... thats a massive 435 mile journey by sea and road... but before I get into this let me tell you why im travelling this ridicilous distance... the reason is the Heineken Cup Final... after over a decade since Ulster won the cup down in Dublin at Lansdowne Road... they are back to take on Leinster in the first ever all Ireland Heineken Cup Final!!! So when the chance of getting tickets to the match came up... i was straight onto it!!! And when I was offered a lift by my cousin, his wife and his two kids... i thought to myself there are opporunities here... first witth over 12 hours of travel time i thought to myself i could kill two birds with one stone... firstly the kids are going to get bored... and well i wouldnt mind starting my challenge... so the lift was accepted... and here we are currently on the road to Twickenham!!! And after waiting ages to get on the boat we are on... and after getting are room sorted out... which may i add i have to share with the four others we get ready and head down to the bar... and with pint in hand i find my first challenger!!!   And it is none other than my wee cousin Jay!!! The game of choice is what ive come to call "The Dot Game!" Its a rather simple game... and this is what you need and how to play it!!!

• Firstly all you need is a piece of paper and a pen.
• Next you must draw out a dot grind... 10 by 10... just like the picture below.

• Now your ready to play the game!
• Each player takes a turn to link two dots up together with the pen... horizon and vertical dots can only be joined up... so therefore diagonal is not allowed!!!
• The idea of the game is to make complete squares.
• Once you have completed a square you get to write your first initial in the box.
• If you complete a box you must make another move afterwards.
• The winner is the person who has completed the most boxes.

So that's the rules and regulations and all the boring stuff out of the way... lets get down to the game that I learnt off my mum many years ago... properly at the same age that Jay is now... the game starts off pretty slow... we took turns and nothing was really happening... until Jay managed to mess up and give me a chance to collect four squares... suddenly there was abuse shouted at me... CHEAT!!! What me... I'm no cheat... seriously we have only started playing the game and I win a couple of squares and he is getting on like this... I can't wait to see what he is like if I win the whole game!!! Anyway as the game goes on I use my tactic of trying to make a big long winding chain so that if Jay messes up I can clean up... and while I am doing that Jay takes a couple of squares as I'm concentrating on my chain... but after the chain is complete I focus on Jays area and start to clean up... but still manage to give several away... but then it comes down to it I tactically force Jay into adding a line in chain as he has no were to go... and from then on I completely cleaned up... and that's it the first victory is mine!!! Then suddenly Jay starts kicking off... starting to cry and tell him Mum that I cheated... before trying to lay several right hooks to my face... I was able to duck and dodge all but one of them... that one happened to smack me right in the face... and to tell you the truth... it actually really hurt!!! But the thought of victory soon healed the pain and soon he wised up after I threatened to throw his rugby ball out the window... that's one game and one victory... and hopefully the first of many this weekend!!!

Artemis Beartrappe - 1

The Rest of the World - 0

Welcome Message

Hello again... its me Artemis Beartrappe again... you may remember me from such blogs as Artemis Beartrappe X Box 360 Challenge and Artemis Beartrappe's Take on TV!!! But anyway after over a year of doing the Artemis Beartrappe X Box 360 Challenge I'm no stranger to a challenge... but after the sad demise of the 360 challenge I wanted to do something different... and my new idea came from a book I bought while I was at the Belfast City Airport whilst i was heading to Liverpool for a trip away... the book in question is "Dave Gorman vs The Rest of the World." The book follows the journey of Dave Gorman whilst he travels around playing games against people who answered his tweet asking if anyone fancied a game! Now Dave only did sports and board games and after reading this i thought to myself how hard could it be??? So from this point out I am sending out an open challenge to everyone out there... no challenge is too big... none is too small!!! Whether it be a game of table tennis... a high stakes game of poker... a dangerous game of snakes and ladders... or some games on the Xbox in tribute of the 360 Challenge!!! Well the challenge is out there... now all i have to say is... BRING IT ON!!!